Even the Greatest Need Daily Affirmation

In order to write well it is always best to write what you know. It is the least to say that I have faced many trials and errors in my life but this story is a little different. This story will relate to the masses who journeyed to Nashville and I hope it will also serve as relief in the comfort that they don’t face the same fears alone. Like everyone else who leave their hometown to venture towards the land of opportunities, Nashville would steadily become a place we would call home.

In the face of reality we had to find steady jobs to keep afloat. And after settling a year in a half later I can honestly say we have crossed many paths, faced many demons, made many friendships, and found a great church to plug into. But something was missing from our DNA! The sense of “wanting to belong” lingered on our hearts. Jess and I have always marched to the beat of our own drums, we always steered away from clicks and cliches. But we had this deep overwhelming feeling of falling. A sense of anxiety overcame our hearts, and we didn’t know how to stop ourselves from feeling this way. “What was the purpose of our move to Nashville?” That was the question that laid heavy on our hearts. With this blurred vision, our journey became stagnant, an uncomfortable place in which Jesse and I did not want to be. This dormant season made for a very interesting experience. Where once the familiar now became unfamiliar, and we found ourselves second guessing our every move.

Speaking from my own experience, I felt I was quickly diminishing.  Everything that made up my DNA was invalid and I felt I had to recreate myself. I was trying to prove myself worthy ALL THE TIME.   My palms would become sweaty, my forehead would begin to sweat, and my stomach would start turning in directions one should not utter out loud.  It became exhausting!  I even caught myself practicing the lines in my head of what I should say and how I should say it before I would say it.  I was losing my identity.  I was falling into a cycle of intimidation.

The latin word intimidation is intimidātus and that means “to make afraid.” Now if anybody who knows me, and knows me well then they can vouch for me when I say, “I do not get intimidated very easily!”  I would rather poke my eye out before I let someone else belittle me and make me feel less than worthy. Nashville is an incredible city where talented and innovative people come to pursue their dreams.  But it is also a city where people can conveniently fall into the routine of monotony and identity crises. A place where fear can filter the mind and make you doubt your calling and purpose.

2 Timothy 1:6-7

6 This is why I remind you to fan into flames the spiritual gift God gave you when I laid my hands on you. 7 For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.

Even the greatest need affirmation. Paul speaks here of a need for Timothy to rekindle the gift God had given him. There are many things that we can’t fix, but there are some things that can, and our gifts can lead to that of healing and restoration. Our journey, and the power of the Gospel can be life-changing for ourselves as well as the people around us. We need to be prepared for the opportunities that God will give us to be a witness. What’s the challenge? To be the best servants we can be!  To live life extraordinary.  This is certainly not the time to loose our focus, but to strengthen our commitment.  God has given us certain abilities, and we need to train ourselves to use them to the fullest.

Our journey now still isn’t easy, but we refocused our attention to whats important and not to whats expected. Jesse and I have decided to take the challenge and put into practice more to trust in God as oppose to man.  We know our calling and we know why we are in Nashville, now its just a matter of following through what God called us to do.  In doing so, “NO” will be in our vocabulary a lot more, and we may have to use it towards situations that may seem like an incredible opportunity but it doesn’t always mean that its the BEST opportunity.

Remind yourself who you are and whose you are! Speak authority into your life and into your families life. Love out loud and make a different with the tools that God has gifted you with.

And to make you laugh I thought this video is the perfect anecdote to help bring you back to focus…or just bring a smile to your face…

“because I am good enough, smart enough, and dog garnet, people like me!”

La Unica Reina

Pieces of the Puzzle

Obscure journeys to the unknown is scary and risky.  Sometimes life and its obstacles can bring uncertainty to an individual. We are fashioned into understanding the concept that if you can see it and touch it then its real in all its essence. But its those risk takers that are willing to believe in something that they cannot yet see but can visualize. The dreamers and visionaries are the ones that take that leap believing that something or someone will catch them.  They wholeheartedly understand that although they can’t see the 1,000 piece puzzle in its in entirety,  they somehow believe that every moment in their life has lead them to the next piece of the puzzle,  leading them to their full composition.

The obscurity of vision at times can be discouraging.  Not understanding or seeing the “Big Picture” can put a strain on anyone’s life, inputting doubt and fear into our lives.  I struggle with this time and time again, but I constantly remind myself that there is purpose in our struggles and trials. In death there is life and in life there is death…(okay I am getting a bit off subject and philosophical) nonetheless, there is truth behind everything.   Whether I will learn something from it today or teach someone about it tomorrow, all of it will eventually make sense.

Don’t give up in spite of your present circumstances.  Keep believing and you will eventually see the pieces of your life come together.

Until Next Time


Watkins! What an Amazing School!

I am proud to say that I am a Watkins student!  The next 4 years will be intense, stressful, challenging, but most of all an adventure.  I am looking forward to the highs and lows within my journey at Watkins.  Ready to take on a challenge that God put in my heart a long time ago, .  It is my time to fulfill my purpose and my destiny.  I am ready to create!  Check out the link below and enjoy!

Unitl Next Time

La Unica Reina

Watkins Online Tour from Jayson Wall on Vimeo.

Step by Step…

One Small Step for man kind one giant step for Zion Max.  Zion Max is so freakin amazing!  He makes me laugh every chance he gets.  I love his sense of adventure when it comes to things around the house, however, getting him to walk has been a challenge.  He has this “when I’m ready I’m ready’ attitude, and I love that about him.  As many times as I tried to walk with him and then slowly release my hand from his, he refuses to take his first steps.  Instead he would gently lower himself to the ground and then clap his hands as though he accomplished something big.  I, as a mommy, do not discourage anything my babies do, so I did what any Mommy would do and clap and cheered him on.  Because I see it as this, it may not be anything big to us, since we walk all day everything, but for Zion its new, its fresh,  just to be able to stand alone with no support is a huge accomplishment for him!

Now, after weeks of trying My Zion has finally taken his first leap of faith into the unknown world of wabblling and collapsing.  He has been doing great!  And Mommy is sooo Proud.  Enjoy the video of Zion’s first steps…

First steps… from Jesse “fuser” Santoyo on Vimeo.

Random Useless Facts…

Honey is the only food that does not spoil. Honey found in the tombs of Egyptian pharaohs has been tasted by archaeologists and found edible.

Months that begin on a Sunday will always have a “Friday the 13th.”

Coca-Cola would be green if colouring weren’t added to it.

Earth is the only planet not named after a god.

It’s against the law to burp, or sneeze in a church in Nebraska, USA.

You’re born with 300 bones, but by the time you become an adult, you only have 206.

Some worms will eat themselves if they can’t find any food!

Dolphins sleep with one eye open!

It is impossible to sneeze with your eyes open

The worlds oldest piece of chewing gum is 9000 years old!

The longest recorded flight of a chicken is 13 seconds

Slugs have 4 noses.

Owls are the only birds who can see the colour blue.

A man named Charles Osborne had the hiccups for 69 years!

A giraffe can clean its ears with its 21-inch tongue!

The average person laughs 10 times a day!

An ostrich’s eye is bigger than its brain

Right handed people live, on average, nine years longer than left-handed people

Your ribs move about 5 million times a year, everytime you breathe!

The elephant is the only mammal  that can’t jump!

One quarter of the bones in your body, are in your feet!

Like fingerprints, everyone’s tongue print is different!

Fingernails grow nearly 4 times faster than toenails!

Most dust particles in your house are made from dead skin!

Adolf Hitler was a vegetarian, and had only ONE testicle.

Until Next Time

La Unica Reina